Distracted Hearts
by SwiftDemise
Summary: Haruka is happily in love with Michiru but she finds herself having strong feelings for Usagi and does the only thing she knows to do, she acts on them. Will Usagi feel the same way? How will Michiru and Mamoru react to their lover's betrayal?
1. Chapter 1

**Distracted Hearts**

_AN: __This is my first Sailor Moon story so please be nice, I have been a fan of the series for a very long time, at least the parts that I have seen here in the United States. _

_I, personally, have always loved Serena and Darien but I have recently discovered that I very much like Serena and Amara together as well. _

_Please review and let me know how you like it so far and I will try to get the next chapter up as soon as possible.  
Thank you!_

_Ps-I will be using the Japanese versions of their names Usagi, Haruka, Michiru but not for Darien because the name Mamoru just makes me think of that word for boobs in the English language. Lol. _

**Haruka**

Michiru knows me better than anybody and she should, seeing as we grew up together. For years, we thought we were cousins but we were closer than that, almost like siblings, if siblings secretly lusted after each other the way we did. After we learned that our bonds were not familial, we became even closer, lovers, I suppose you could say.

I don't know when it started, I've never been much for sharing my feelings but I know that I am grateful for Michiru's love. She sees my heart even through my walls, through my facades, I don't know how I would get along without her and yet…

There is Usagi, princess and future queen of the moon.

Until I met her, I didn't think there could be anyone as pure hearted as my Michiru but I was wrong.

Usagi is the definition of purity.

I don't know which pains me more, the fact that I am betraying Michiru with my thoughts or the fact that she isn't more upset with me over it.

"Oh Haruka, you get so serious over the silliest of things." her eyes sparkling as she laughs.

I don't know why her reaction surprised me, as I said, she know me better than anybody, "You aren't-aren't you upset?"

"Why should I be upset over a little crush?"

"A crush? You aren't worried that I might be falling in love?"

For some reason she thinks that is funnier, I don't think I've ever made her laugh so hard before. I sigh and sink down into the chair by the window. When she finally stops laughing, she walks over to me.

"This is really bothering you isn't it? I'm sorry for laughing."

"T've never felt this way before, I'm so confused."

Michiru kneels down in front of me and takes my hands in hers, "Haruka, do you remember what I said to you when we were 13 and you were worried that my music would take me far away?"

I nod, how could I forget? I had been angry an entire week because I thought Michiru was going to leave for a music school in New York. "You said I shouldn't worry because we would be together forever."

Michiru smiles, "Even when we believed that we were cousins, I knew that somehow you and I would never be separated. That is why I am not worried by your new feelings for Usagi."

"I want to protect her with my life, I want to hold her in my arms. These are things that I should only feel for you."

"We all love her and want to protect her but that is because she is our princess, our queen; the rest that you feel is only lust."

"You really think so?"

Michiru kisses my hands, "I know it. This is a simple crush that you will get over eventually."

I touch her cheek, overwhelmed with love for the girl in front of me, "What should I do about it?"

"Hmmmm, you could find out if she feels the same for you. Sometimes a splash of cold water is just what we need to wake up from a nice dream."

"You think she'll reject me?" the thought hadn't yet occurred to me.

"Usagi is deeply in love with Darien that much is clear but she is young and easily distracted, you may win her for a few minutes but her heart will belong to him for all eternity."

I think about this for a bit, meanwhile Michiru stands up and head to the kitchen, "I'll make us some tea."

It's just a crush. There is no chance that Usagi and I will ever be togther, I know all of this already. Usagi and Darien are destined to be together, they have a daughter for crying out loud. Still, I can't help but wonder.

I wouldn't force her to leave him but maybe we could be a secret? Rini would still be born and I'd still get to be with the princess.

I shake the thought from my head, it's far too selfish.

I announce to Michiru that I'm going for a ride, she just smirks and tells me to have fun and be careful.

The speed helps clear my mind, I hadn't realized until I stepped out side, how anxious I was. I could feel little beads of sweat on my forehead and neck but the cool night air helped. A lot of the time, I get mistaken for a man because of my short hair, deep voice and choice in clothes but I've never really tried to look like one. It's the 20th century, pant suits aren't just for men anymore. Besides, I can't exactly were a miniskirt on my motorcycle, talk about road rash. I use the same logic when it comes to my hair, it's about practicality and comfort. How would I be able to see the road if long hair is flying in my face all the time? Not to mention helmets are more comfortable when you don't have to worry about hair getting caught or messy. More than any of that, I love the way it feels like the wind is massaging my scalp as I speed through the busy streets of Tokyo. Usagi and Mina both thought I was a guy when they first met me, I wonder if it would be easier for Usagi to love me if I was, probably not.

Both of them are far too good for me, don't get me wrong, Michiru has a darkside. I think being a Scout is tough on her. She is a star musician, she creates masterpieces with her hands and her mind but the life of a scout has hardened her a little. She isn't exactly the same as before. As for me, I am just a dumb jock, a thrill seeker. Being a scout doesn't phase me as much as it should, except for the part that I can no longer pursue my dreams to be a world famous race car driver. How would it look if I left in the middle of a race to go save the world from evil forces? I am already hard on the inside, maybe that is why I am so drawn to them. They are light in my darkness, warmth for my cold soul.

If I told Michiru any of this she would probably say that I must be getting soft.

That's a good thing right? If I am it is her doing, Michiru's love is changing me little by little.

I wonder if it's something similar for Darien, I know he isn't hard like me but he's got his own lonely past so maybe?

I wonder if he is a jealous guy, would he throw her away the minute she was unfaithful? Would it bother him more or less that I am a woman?

After an hour or so, I turn around and head home. Michiru is in bed reading a book when I get there.

"How was your ride Haruka?"

I take off my motorcycle jacket and toss it on the chair near the closet, " It was relaxing, it's a very nice night out."

"Yes, I saw. The moon is full and bright tonight."

I ignore her pointed comment about the moon, clearly Usagi is still on both of our minds. I remove my jeans and crawl into bed next to her. She is wearing her blue silk night gown, my favorite and she knows this.

"How contradictory." I muse aloud as I crawl on top of her.

Michiru smiles, "I didn't mean to be."

Her book falls to the floor as she buries her hands in my hair and we kiss. That night we make love several times before falling asleep in each other's arms.

I fall asleep knowing that this is where I belong, with Michiru.


	2. Chapter 2

_AN: I didn't really get too much feedback on the first part but maybe I can reel you guys in with a bit of action. _

_I just want to make it clear that this story will be in Haruka and Darien's POV, I forgot to mention it before. I also want to make note that for my story Serena is 16 and Darien is 18, not that it will come up at all but I just wanted to make it clear. Serena is in High School or whatever the equivalent is in Japan and Darien is in College(or the Japanese equivalent) with Haruka and Michiru. _

_Sorry guys, I'm just a stinking American with no clue how the education system works in Japan, but I do know that they have exams and often. I watched Inuyasha so I've got that figured out at least. Lol._

_Reviews are vehemently encouraged._

**Haruka****- part 2**

The next morning, Michiru has her teaching job for the kindergarten art class, which means that I'll be on my own until late afternoon.

She kisses my forehead as she leaves, I wait until I hear the front door click before I turn over and try to get a few more hours of sleep.

I only sleep for two hours but as I do I dream of her. I dream of Usaig, of kissing and making love to her, and then I dream of being with both of them together. I wake up in a sweat, my hair sticking to my face and neck.

After a long, cold shower and some breakfast, I'm out the door and ready to face the day. I ride my bike past the kindergarten and drop off Michiru's lunch, she prefers to paint during her break so I usually bring her something and force her to eat.

I study her latest masterpiece as she works on her lunch, I can feel her eyes on me, trying to read my mind but I don't take my eyes off the painting.

"Tokyo at twilight, it's very beautiful Michiru. What's this blank space in the middle though?"

"It's not quite finished yet, I keep sensing a dark force over the city but I don't know what it is."

"A new enemy? Do you think we'll be needed?" I try not to sound hopeful.

"This force feels old but I don't think it's a battle we are meant to fight, I just wish I could see what it is."

"How will you finish it then?" I finally turn to look at her, she's finished her food already.

"Hmmmm, well I did hear that the Circus was in town. Maybe it'll cheer up the painting." She stands next to me and smiles.

"Looks like your break is over, I better go."

"What will you do Haruka?" we both know what she is referring too though I wish she hadn't brought it up.

I sigh heavily, " I don't know yet but I'll pick you up later alright?"

Michiru nods, "Later then."

I walk out of the building and hop on my motorcycle, I'll have to change it for my car so I can pick up Michiru but for now I just want to enjoy the speed.

Somehow I end up at the park near Rini's school and I already know that Usagi is there waiting, but not for me. I think we must come equipped with some kind of lojack thing because no matter where she is, us Scouts always seem to find her right when we need to.

Reluctantly, I climb off my bike and start walking, my feet know where to go even if I don't. That park isn't very crowded today, just the usual mothers pushing stollers, joggers and children who are still too young for school.

Usagi is sitting on a park bench near the pond, she's wearing one of her fitted dresses that barely goes past her thighs. She doesn't see me come up behind her, doesn't sense me because she is engrossed in one of her mangas. I put my hands over her eyes, which gets a small gasp of, "Oh!" from her. I smile and whisper low into her ear, "Guess who?"

Her heart speeds up a little and I feel her smile, " Uh…Let's see….Darien?"

Figures she would guess him first, she's probably expecting him. "Wrong." I whisper, trying not to sound jealous.

"Andrew? Is that you?"

"Wrong again Princess" I don't whisper this time.

She smiles and pulls my hands away, "Haruka!" she leans her head back to look at me.

I grin down at her, my hands resting on the bench on either side of her, "Hey there beautiful, shouldn't you be in school?"

"Not me, we've got the day off to study for exams."

"What are you doing reading mangas in the park?"

She blushes and laughs, "You know me, I just couldn't concentrate besides, it's too nice a day for studying."

"I see, so are you all alone today?" If her friends are around it will be easier for me to resist the thoughts that her dress has already put into my head, I glance around but don't see any of the other Scouts.

"Rini gets out in an hour so I'm waiting."

Of course she is waiting for Rini, they bicker frequently and annoyingly but they love each other as mother and daughter should. I don't remember my mother, I don't think any Scout does, our mission since birth has been to protect the earth and our Princess Usagi. There isn't any bitterness or regret, those emotions are impossible when you are defending someone as warm and full of love as Usagi. I wonder if Michiru is even a little bit jealous of my feelings for Usagi, maybe not but it's possible.

I must have been deep in thought because when Usagi calls my name there is concern in her voice. I blink to refocus my eyes but now she is standing, staring at me and the bench is between us.

"Haruka, is something wrong?" her head tilts to the side, "You know you can talk to me if you have a problem."

I shake my head and try to smile, "There is nothing wrong, I was just thinking about things."

She moves next to me and takes my hands, "Are you sure there isn't anything wrong, you really zoned out on me there."

I wonder what she tastes like, with Michiru it's roses and the faintest bit of chlorine from all the time she spends at the pool.

I don't want to scare Usagi so I search my mind for the right words to say, this could be my only chance.

"Usagi?" I take a few steps back, the space between us helps me to think clearer.

"Yes?" her eyes big with concern.

"Have you ever been in love with anyone besides Darien?"

She blushes and laughes, " Well…" she scratches her head, " I used to have a crush on Andrew, then there was Alan who turned out to be an alien, then there was the Moonlight Knight who turned out to be Darien's memories." She giggles and leans against the back of the bench.

I can't help but smile even though it's clear that she's never really loved anyone but him.

"What about you Haruka, are you crushing on anybody lately?"

Finally we're here at the big question, is it just a crush or something a little deeper? Is it possible to love two people at the same time? I want to believe that it is but maybe I'm being selfish again and greedy. "Maybe but I don't think it's as simple as a crush, I think it's deeper."

"Oh wow! How exciting, do I know the person? C'mon spill Haruka!"

I take a step closer to her and lean forward, my eyes lock on to hers, "Can you guess?"

She is smarter than anyone gives her credit for, I can see on her face almost immediately that she understands but then again I don't think I'm being all that subtle. "Oh!" she squeaks and tries to step back but she is already up against the back of the bench, "Haruka?"

I take another step closer so our bodies are nearly touching, "I can't stop thinking about you Usagi." I caress her cheek, taking pleasure in its warmth.

She's blushing harder now and I can feel her heart beat quickening again, "Haruka but-"

I kiss her before she can finish, I already know what she was going to say. Usagi moves her arms in between our chests to push me away but I wrap my arms around her tighly and hold her between myself and the bench. I know I'm forcing myself on her but it's the only way to keep her guilt free, she'd be depressed for days if she thought she'd consented to it in any way. If I don't let her play the victim, she'll be ruined, the purity gone and nothing left but shame and the guilt of betrayal.

I don't mind being the villain of this love triangle.

The need to breathe forces me to end the kiss, I'm panting as I look down at her. She's breathing heavily as well but there are tears running down her cheeks and she won't look me in the eyes.

What did I do? Was this the wrong way to show her? Did I ruin everything?

"Usagi!"

Darien's voice jolts us both awake from our shock. Serena's head snaps up and meets my eyes for the first time. I release her and take a few steps back, she immediately runs to Darien.

When I finally turn my head to look at them, I see that she is wrapped in his arms, her face buried in his chest and she is crying. Darien barely looks at me, I'm not sure what he's feeling at the moment because his eyes flick away too quickly and he turns away to lead her to his car a few feet away.

I watch him open the door for her and help her in then I turn around and start walking in the direction of my bike. I have to hurry home and switch it for the car so that I can pick up Michiru.

For the first time in days, my mind is completely clear as I ride home because I'm no longer worried about my feelings for Usagi. When I pull up in front of the kindergarten, Michiru is already waiting for me, "Am I very late?" I ask as I step out to open the door for her.

She smiles, "Not very, did you get distracted by something?" she slides into the passenger seat.

I close the door and walk back over to my side. Michiru is very direct in a subtle way, I also think she enjoys teasing me. " I kissed Usagi in the park today." I answer honestly because I have no reason to lie to Michiru, "Darien saw us."

Her eyes sparkle mischeviously like I've just let her in on a dark secret, "I see, so how was it Haruka?"

I smile a little despite my guilt, "She eats far too much candy and junk."

Michiru laughs, "Oh no! Was it bad?"

I shake my head, "Not at all, she tastes unbelievably sweet and somehow like snow."

Michiru giggles, "Well she is from the moon, it's a very cold place."

"I only hope Darien doesn't give her a hard time over it."

"I can't imagine why you would do it in a public place like that but it's better that he knows. There should not be any secrets between any of us."

"You're right, Michiru."

"Hmmmm…"

"What is it?" I glance at her quickly then back at the road.

"I was just wondering what Darien would taste like?"

To say I'm shocked is an understatement, "Are you serious?"

"Well why not? I've never kissed a man before, I want to know what one tastes like."

"Trust me Michiru, they aren't that great."

Michiru laughs, " Am I detecting jealousy Haruka?"

Maybe a little jealousy but I was serious about my comment. The last time I kissed a male I was 10 years old and he tasted like mud and bugs, needless to say I never wanted to kiss another male again. "You'll have to wait your turn Michiru, I don't think he'll be leaving Usagi's side for a while."

"You're probably right but I can wait, I've got my hands full enough with you."

"Am I so much trouble?"

She smiles, "Just easily distracted, fortunately I know how to get your attention, " she pats my thigh and rests her head on my shoulder.

She certainly does know how to keep my attention, I don't think about Usagi for the rest of the day.


	3. Chapter 3

_**AN:**__ Yeah I know, it's been a while since I updated but believe me it was only because I was busy working on this story. I managed to figure out what I basically want to happen with the characters. We'll be nearing the climax of this story fairly soon and I'm pretty much just trying to figure out how to end it. _

_Hopefully it won't be too long before my next update. _

_Thanks so much for being patient and reviewing. _

_I also want to apologize if this chapter seems kind of short, I became kind of crunched for time as I was typing it and had to cut the chapter in half. The next chapter is worth waiting for though. _

**Darien**

I am human.

I am a man.

I am not perfect or pure by any account.

I am jealous.

I am confused.

I am angry.

I don't know who I'm angry at yet but I do know that it's not Serena's fault. I think I'm angry at both of them but mostly Haruka and maybe myself a little bit.

I don't know how much I believe in fate and destiny, I think a person can change fate if they really want to. Queen Serenity changed fate when she sacrificed her own life to resurrect us and send us to Earth. Usagi believes in destiny, she believes that we are meant to be together forever, that's why I know the thing in the park was Haruka's doing. Usagi doesn't have it in her to leave me, let alone betray anyone.

As for me, I'm certain I could leave her if I wanted to but I never will. We've seen the future, I know what greatness and peace our love brings to the world and I wouldn't trade it for anything.

When I saw them I was jealous and angry but when Usagi ran into my arms crying, I was confused and concerned.

Neither of us speak as I drive to Rini's school, the plan had been to go back to my apartment and spend time with my girls. Help Rini with homework, have dinner together and just have some quality family time. Family is important to me, especially considering that I don't truly remember my own.

This thing with Haruka has left us both confused I think, I know Usagi is worried about my reaction but we can't seem to talk about it just yet.

Rini is cheerful and happy to see us both so I try to focus on her ramblings about school. Usagi is too quiet, she doesn't even try to pretend for Rini's sake that nothing is wrong.

"Usagi? Darien? What's wrong? Why are you so quiet today Usagi?"

I look over and see that Usagi's eyes are closed, silent tears running down her cheeks, I decide to cover for her, "Looks like Usagi fell asleep on us Rini, I think she had a busy day."

She chokes a little on that and I feel cruel but she isn't the only one in pain here. Maybe there is something left over from the Negaverse's brainwashing still in me.

When we get to my apartment, Rini shows us the drawing she made in class. It's a forest with a beautiful lake and a white Pegasus, we both compliment her picture.

"Usagi?"

"Yes Rini?" she smiles at our daughter.

"Well you seem really down today so I want you to have my picture."

Usagi takes the picture and gives Rini a hug, "Thank you Rini."

I leave them to their studies and get started on dinner, I use the alone time to collect my thoughts.

Whatever anger I had towards Usagi has long subsided and I move my thoughts to Haruka.

I guess it never occurred to me that there might be someone who would try to take Usagi away from me, I never worried about competition or that she would find someone else. Even when Prince Diamond took her away, literally, and tried to trick her into loving him, I chalked it up to him just being power hungry.

I guess it was my own stupidity and naivety that blinded me before.

Now that I think about it, he wasn't the first to desire my Usagi. That Alan guy was also infatuated with her, I never thought about it back then because my memories were not intact until after he had already moved on.

I know what it is that draws them to her because it is the same thing that draws me and keeps me by her side.

Okay, so I guess my anger towards Haruka is….lessened? Definitely not gone. I'm mostly confused now because I know for a fact that Haruka and Michiru are together, the scouts don't know it but I do because Michiru told me so.

"You and Serena have such a beautiful love, I think I'm jealous of you two sometimes."

"Isn't there anyone you imagine being with forever Michiru? Someone you love more than anything?"

She laughed, "I do have that, with Haruka but she is so easily distracted that sometimes I can't help worrying. She gets so lost inside herself sometimes but I know that she loves me."

Easily distracted, I understand what she means and I'm thankful that Usagi isn't as easily distracted. Not as fickle with her heart as Haruka seems to be. It's obvious that Usagi is just another distraction to her and I feel bad for Michiru.

I've mellowed out significantly and from the sounds in the living room, I think Rini has driven away Usagi's sadness for now. That is good, dinner is just about ready but I've got one more person to confront in my head.

Myself.

Up til now, I've been blind, foolish and naïve. I knew that there wasn't any possible way that Usagi would leave me and so I think I may have taken her love for granted. Even when I pushed her away and tried to make her hate me, she just kept coming back until I couldn't resist her anymore.

I've never worried that I might lose her so I've slacked off trying to keep her. I thought I was a pretty good boyfriend up till now. I was being lazy with my love and maybe Haruka saw it. Maybe she could tell that I was not appreciating Usagi like I should or maybe she just didn't care either way.

It's hard to get inside her head, to figure out what she was hoping to accomplish with this. I wonder if she'll tell Michiru what happened, how will Michiru feel?

I don't deserve Usagi's love but I've got it and I will fight to keep it.

I peek into the living room where Usagi and Rini are having an argument over homework or something, "Can you two set the table, this is just about done."

Dinner is relatively quiet which is pretty unbelievable considering that I'm having it with Rini and Usagi. Usagi's somber mood has returned and I think Rini is more than certain now that something is up with us because aside from small talk and school, she keeps quiet as well.

I hate this. I hate that Usagi isn't not talking and laughing. I hate that Rini has to see us like this.

After dinner, I ask Usagi to help me with the dishes while Rini watches cartoons on the little tv set I bought last month.

I wait for Rini to plop down on the floor and crank up the volume before I follow Usagi into the kitchen. It's time for us to talk and yet, as we start on the dishes, I don't know what to say.

Before too long the dishes are done and I watch as Usagi dries her hands off.

"I think we'd better go now." It's little more than a whisper and it takes a second for the words to reach my brain.

Usagi turns to leave the kitchen but I reach out, grabbing her wrist to stop her, "Usagi, please stay."

She looks up at me with hopeful eyes and I know that I've been a jerk. She wants nothing more than forgiveness for something that was never her fault to begin with. I should have said something, a kind word or gesture to let her know that we would be okay. Instead I let her stew in her own thoughts all this time, I'm sure that she has been assuming the worst.

I lightly pull her close to me and lift her chin so that our eyes meet, "I love you Usagi, always and forever."

Before she can say anything, I kiss her and try to erase all the memories of this afternoon from both our minds.

I loosen my grip on her wrist and let my hand drop down to her waist so that I can pull her closer, meanwhile her hands bury themselves in my hair.

We finally break apart several minutes later, out of breath and flushed. Usagi smiles up at me and I smile back then kiss her forehead, I don't want to let her go but we've left Rini alone for too long.


End file.
